At some point in our lives we all face major changes. Some are good which we look forward to with great expectations and excitement such as weddings, the birth of a child, or a job promotion. Some unfortunately hit us like a freight train, knocking us off our feet, the death of a loved one, sickness, or (and I’m just throwing things out here) having problems with your website template not communicating with your feed and realizing you need to start from scratch on the visual design of your blog. Clearly, some will drastically impact our lives more than others. We may never fully recover from the loss of a family member, but hopefully the sickness and blog issues are just temporary. Their severity may fluctuate greatly, but what changes do all have in common is how we can respond to them.
Take Time to Grieve
Whether the changes are good or bad, we need to take time to assess what’s going on in and around us to fully appreciate the transformations taking place and how to have a victorious life thereafter. Where there is a loss, grief is present. I have found it helpful even during the happy changes to realize that there is generally some sort of loss that occurs as you step into new situations. You may be beyond ecstatic for your upcoming marriage, but don’t forget to take at least a little bit of time to address the loss of what you are leaving behind. Hopefully, your wedding day is anything but a time of sadness, but before you get to the aisle, it’s okay to allow yourself to understand that things are never going to be quite the same, even though this is a time of joy.
Most people find that if they don’t address these feelings appropriately as they arise, they end up manifesting later. This doesn’t have to mean that you are locked away in your room weeping for days on end, it might be enough to just acknowledge to yourself or a trusted loved one that change is occurring and you are leaving behind a part of your life and moving forward. Of course during difficult changes, this grief period may be much more substantial. But it is all an essential part of the process of healing and growth.
Watch Your Stress Levels
Stress is often a close companion of change. More often than not, change requires a great deal of time, energy, and part of your sanity. Organizing schedules, collecting materials, and meeting with people can all take their toll on your already taxed emotional and physical health. The last thing you need during a major life change is to catch a nasty cold or find yourself curled up in the corner with the worst migraine of your life. Try your best to stick to a normal sleep schedule, eat as healthy as possible, and make sure you leave time for fun and relaxing activities in between the chaos. Also, don’t be afraid to reach out for a helping hand. Friends and family may not know what to do or say during difficult times but would love to be a support. Practical things like having them run a few errands or watch the kids for a night can be beneficial for both of you.
Check Your Attitude
After the grieving and fighting through the stress, it’s easy to become disillusioned, distracted, and even depressed. In the midst we may not see why things are happening or that there is any way out. We must believe and have faith that redemption is real. Even situations that may seem to be the end of life as we know it can hold the seeds for our success as never imagined before. This is not something that comes naturally or easily, we must make a conscious choice to set our hearts and thoughts on the greater things. When negative thoughts arise we must immediately choose to replace them with positive words. This bend in the road is only leading you towards your destiny; we wouldn’t want our fears and doubts to keep us sidetracked in the ditch. If it is all feeling too overwhelming, do not get defeated. There are numerous people who can help, chat with a friend, open up to your spouse, seek out advice from a religious leader, or a professional. This is just one more step, and the best part is we hold the key to decide how it will turn out. Choose life, choose to learn from this situation, and choose to let it improve who you are. It will be redeemed.
Walking in the Transformation
Most of us don’t like change, and too often it is not a quick and easy process. But allowing yourself to grieve, not getting stressed out, and having a positive attitude will get you on the right track for healing and growth. Look to the future with optimism; the old way of doing things may not be the way you will function in the days to come. It may be helpful to write out your future goals and start to see what direction you need to pursue to achieve your dreams. This can be the time to get back on track or it might be the start of a whole new journey. Be open for new ideas and don’t close yourself off from the good that lies ahead.
Taking my Own Advice
As of yesterday, change once again thrust itself upon me in an unexpected way. I am having a few issues with the template of my blog causing my feed to not function properly. If you have not been receiving the email notifications for the last week or so, that would be the reason. The problem runs a little deeper than that, but it boils down to the fact that I will most likely have to change the entire layout of the site. First step…grief! Despite my raging hormones with the pregnancy, I surprisingly have not cried, not yet anyway. I acknowledged the loss and was pretty disappointed for most of the evening. Next step, I forced myself to go to sleep at the regular time last night despite wanting to stay up ‘til all hours fixing the problem. I also restrained from gorging on chocolate in a “forget-it-all” moment; so far so good. Currently, I have accepted that this change appears to be inevitable. So, rather than letting it get me down and ruin my week, I am excited to now have the opportunity create a new design and make the site even better. That’s what I’m telling myself anyway. I know it will be a lot of work, but here’s to change! Look forward to a grand re-opening of the new and improved Sezen Your Life soon to come 🙂
*Exciting update (2-14-12, 8:00pm): Thanks to the online forums I was able to adjust some code to make the original blog design function with the feed! There will be no major overhaul of the site this week!
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